I Watched the Ten Worst Anime Ever

I am a glutton for punishment, of course. So here I am, about to watch the ten worst-rated anime ever. This is what happens when COVID-19 hits, so let’s roll with the punches.

I made the list going for the ten worst anime according to MyAnimeList as of 23rd May 2020. I did not include any unranked anime, only the ones with a rating. I want to see if there are any redeeming qualities, and how (if at all) the anime could be improved.

And yes, even Pupa, Boku no Pico and School Days came out better than this selection (although the latter two have ironic high reviews). I did discuss School Days last week, if you wanted to reflect on that.

Tenkuu Danzai Skelter + Heaven – (1.89/10)

I really don’t like the use of 3D rendering in anime in the first place, so that was horribly unsettling. Not only that, there is the plot, but whether or not it exists depends on what you mean by plot – is it the story or is it fanservice? It’s definitely the latter.

There only seems to be some semblance of a story towards the end, and this is an anime that could have been good if the production quality and length were up to par. It’s not my preferred anime genre anyway, but I would have liked to have seen more detail into how this military functions.

It has potential, but it is, at base level, awful.

But honestly, Boku no Pico was worse. Skelter + Heaven didn’t sexualise pre-pubescent boys, after all.

Utsu Musume Sayuri – (2.09/10)

This was a bit harder to find than a couple of the others. But I’m thankful this was a short ride. I’m also thankful for the subtitles letting me know what the characters were saying in English.

‘Please, strike me here on my butt’ while pointing to the butt, and begging. This turned into some kind of weird porn, I’m sure.

That was fucking weird. Was this about a huge two-minute build-up to getting spanked like a naughty child? What on earth…

Hametsu no Mars – (2.30/10)

This is the only anime that I’ve watched prior to writing this, and I found it awful before – that said, this was going back a few years. Also known as ‘Mars of Destruction’, this anime is…famously awful. For that reason, it’s also a cult classic. The only redeeming quality is the soundtrack, of which isn’t even an original soundtrack and consists of various classical songs.

A side note, at least we got a doctor to inform us that the girl whose head got blown off was indeed dead. Nice work!

I think the idea that humans had originally invaded Earth, and the ‘Ancients’ attempting to reclaim it is interesting and could have been a great plot-point in a different anime setting with higher quality writing and better production. Apart from Takeru, there is no personality in any of these characters, and the teenage girls might as well all have been one character.

Overall, it’s just really confusing to watch at the best of times. What is the whole story behind Takeru and his dad? The location jumps with different shifts in tone from the battle with the super-Ancient to the scene in America with bittersweet music, it’s strange. I think the last two scenes could have been placed alongside together with intense music, with a lot more tension built up. I think overall, the entire anime would have been better expanded and explained in a 12-episode series. Considering that this is the from the same studio that brought Skelter + Heaven, you shouldn’t be surprised by the lack of depth.

Kokuhaku – (2.39/10)

Well this was very short. A girl comes up to someone (in that person’s POV) and slices them and the POV person dies. Still a better love story than Twilight, but still not what I was hoping to see on a Saturday afternoon, that’s for certain.

Nami – (2.44/10)

It was so difficult to find Nami, actually, without running into a lot of One Piece videos. But from what I could tell, it’s very disturbing to say the least.

Abunai Sisters: Koko & Mika – (2.55/10)

Oh this was something that is just fanservice with not a whole lot else. I could only find the first episode but that was enough for me. It was all very much headache-inducing with awful animations and voice acting, escalating the fanservice at times.

From later research, I found out that only the first two episodes were ever aired, and pulled after only one month on the air. There were a total of ten episodes, however.

Ai (ONA) – (2.71/10)

It’s seven seconds long, with literally no context.

Aki no Puzzle – (2.77/10)

Seizure warning right from the start with the title cards. This is focused on various sketches compiled together with horrible flashing. Even though I don’t have epilepsy, there was something about it that unsettled me, hurt my eyes and made me actually feel a bit sick. I couldn’t watch all of it, that’s for certain.

Love Bites – (2.79/10)

From the same guy that brought you Kokuhaku, Love Bites is another short animation that…hold on. Isn’t that the same girl from Kokuhaku? There’s definitely a love confession. What is it with this guy and the gore and violence?

And then there’s stabbing in the eyeball. Great.

Shitcom – (2.83/10)

Again, from the same guy that did Kokuhaku and Love Bites, this time with claymation – you can never go wrong with claymation, right? Right? Okay there’s a woman with bad IBS issues. While her boyfriend is propsing to her. How will she mana-

Oh wait. Are they…are they shitting through their mouths? Okay I’m done. I’m actually completely done with this post.

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